The Truth

"You have hair right there?"
"Where?" she said, providing me the opportunity to save myself
"right there!" I stated this as pointed just below her nose and above her lip.

I obviously failed the opportunity she gave me to retreat from my totally inappropriate statement. I was in 8th grade and I can't recall what compelled me to tell the attractive blonde in the backseat that she had peachfuzz... But I did it anyways.

"so you aren't going to spend the night?"
"No. I can't"
"Why not?" he explained with dissappointment"
"Because I'm growing"

somehow my friend left the conversation extremely offended saying something along the lines of "you always have some bull %$# excuse". I was in 6th grade. There was logic behind my statement. I had been sick a lot lately and my mother had explained to me it was because I was growing alot and it made me more vulnerable to becoming sick... I just left this out of the conversation... I got uninvited to his party.

"do i look fat?"
"..."
"DO I LOOK FAT?"
"..."
I hoped my silence would either magically conjure up a change of subject or give me the time to formulate the proper approach. Needless to say, my sister still hasn't completely forgiven me... That was 10 years ago.

"you are attractive" I explained rationally and matter of factly
"ummm. Thanks" she responded awkwardly.
"do you want to have sex with me? We can do it at my place." My matter of fact manner continued.

She walked away. My ex girlfriend and I had been together for 5 years. We had recently broke up. I thought it was simple. If an attractive girl came up to me and asked me "will you have sex with me?" I would undoubtedly say "yup". With the ill informed concept that all women think like me I simply decided to approach the attractive girl at the bar with the same proposal I would like to recieve. Turns out women don't think the exact same way I do.

This is my life. I tell the truth... Maybe too much. I don't ever lie. There are benefits and disadvantages. I'm not over the top. I don't have bad intentions. I just choose to say the reality as it pertains to me rather then conjuring up a false one... Recently I've begun to notice this need to tell the truth allows for quite a humorous life. These are my stories.